No longer young, not yet old

Recently I had one of those little lightbulb moments and thought of this...

When it comes to 'adulting'...

Your 20s are like the childhood stage of adulting,

Your 30s are like the adolescent phase of adulting,

And your 40s onwards are like the start of the grownup chapter of adulting.

Sometimes in my musings, I like to imagine clever quotes or advice I might give to my younger self. There are many things that if I were to do again, I would have done differently. 

So much of what I did in my early years was because I was trying to 'do the right thing', or to please others or impress them. Of course I would have vehemently denied it at that time. In my mind, I was always convinced that everything I did was for myself.

But it's inevitable that a lot of what we do, especially when we are starting out in life, is outwardly focused. We are all wired that way after all. Humans are by nature social animals. We constantly try out different things to figure out how and where we fit into society. Finding a way to make our mark. To find our niche. It is probably an inherent and necessary phase everyone has to go through (even if I wish it doesn't have to be that way) because it can be such a painful and brutal path that often leaves one feeling just as lonely as ever. 

Of course the truth is, every single individual in the world feels like he or she is an outsider. And some people wll fight tooth and nail to ensure they don't feel left out.

But over the last decade, I feel like my journey has been a journey to find that 'home' has been waiting inside me all along....

...Exploring new and different interests for my own enjoyment and personal discovery.

...Stepping out and away from comfort zones and familiar tribes which has been immensely liberating.

...Exploring new ideologies and dimensions of thinking, initially with some trepidation, but now with confidence and exhilaration. I opened Pandora's Box and am reveling in the learning about both the beauty and horrors of our reality. 

So happy birthday me...

It took me 40 years to look this good!

"To think, when one is no longer young, when one is not yet old, that one is no longer young, that one is not yet old, that is perhaps something."

(Samuel Beckett)